12 ways to stop wanting to buy clothes all the time

Untangling the web of desires that power a constant yearning to shop.

There are many reasons you might want to step back from clothes shopping — managing your budget, considering the environmental impact, honing in on your personal style, reclaiming some mental bandwidth…for me, it’s all of the above.  

I’ve never done any specific low-buy/no-buy challenge, but I would characterize my typical clothes shopping rhythm of the last few years as “low to moderate”: I bought 11 pieces of clothing in 2022 and 2023 each, and 8 so far in 2024. 

I’m always wrestling with temptations like anyone else, but over the years, I’ve found that certain habits and ways of thinking help keep my clothes shopping down. It’s not only about refraining from buying clothes but also about shaping the desire to do so into something slower, more mindful, and organic.

I hope these tactics and mindsets will be helpful or thought-stirring in some way to you.

1. Interrogate yourself and your wardrobe. What do I really want when I think I want these pants? What am I dressing for? What is the state of my closet? Where are the gaps and redundancies? Who did I get influenced by? Dig deep to get to the root of the desire to buy a piece. What is it really? And does it make sense? Is it a desire you want to satisfy?

2. Mind the environment. Ever since I learned that most donated clothes don’t in fact go to those in need locally but are sent far away (to secondhand textile markets like Kantamanto Market in Ghana, where a big chunk of used clothes actually end up in landfill when they can’t be resold)...I started thinking less casually about buying clothes. Buying something is easy, getting rid of it in a productive way… less so. Even brand new returned goods often end up in landfill. These realities challenge me to rethink the common shopping mindsets of “oh I’ll just return it” or “I can always donate it”.

3. Stop having a monthly (or even quarterly) budget for clothing. Instead: track every clothing expense that comes up. Get rid of the expectation that you’ll buy clothes regularly and get comfortable with seeing up close exactly what you’re spending on clothes. Write it down on paper right away (I use one corner of each monthly page in my planner for this). That way it feels more real than a line on a credit card statement. Think of it as the opposite of buy now, pay later — the opposite of out of sight, out of mind. 

I actually use this space to track everything that’s not bills or groceries — here’s a glimpse into my September expenses… I highlighted the two purchases that contain clothing for myself (I discussed those items in my most recent Wardrobe Rebuild update).

4. (If applicable) Make posting outfits a smaller part of your day-to-day social media content. If you love to share your personal style, consider posting through a slower medium like a newsletter or longform YouTube — or turn inward and document outfits with a wardrobe cataloging app like Indyx or just in the Notes app. It’s hard, but avoid thinking of new clothes as easy content.

5. Invest in other areas to improve your life. For most of us, money is finite and it’s just not possible to have the best of the best in every material goods category. There’s a world of finer things beyond clothes. I don’t think of this as an excuse to keep shopping for something else, but as an opportunity to take stock of general wellness. Could my dollars make more of an impact if I spend meaningfully on other things in my daily life? Like sturdier towels or a better fitting office chair? Time and mental load, of course, are also finite. What deficiencies are building when clothes shopping is constantly prioritized?

6. Remember that it’s okay to repeat outfits — even for special occasions. See: this list of outfit repeating celebs. There’s also plenty of great outfit repeating inspiration on Substack —

   OFELIA
   has a great series on just this. I’ve personally lost count of how many times I’ve worn the outfit below to weddings.

7. Shop in person and try on a bunch of things. If you have the luxury of time, spend some of it trying on anything that looks interesting with the understanding that there’s a good chance it won’t work out. It might feel like a waste of time but think of it as a learning opportunity. Get to know your body and what looks good and feels right to you. Try the trends, feel it out. Maybe you’ll absolutely love it, maybe you’ll get it out of your system for good.

8. Track what you buy and/or want to buy. I maintain a spreadsheet for new additions to my closet and use the Notes app and Gmail Tasks to collect things/links I’m eyeing. Whatever the tool or process is, the goal is to stay aware of what you already have and be thoughtful about what you’re bringing in.

9. Be proud, not self-conscious about loving the same garments for a very long time. I’m trying to put this into practice with my “10 Year Closet” series. I’ve also loved seeing similar ideas sprout up on Substack, like

   Lan
   ’s ”30 Wears Collection” series and
   Erika Veurink
   ’s surveys of fashion people’s long-time favorites.

10. Remember: Just because you love it — and it might even look great on you — doesn’t mean you have to have it. I’ve seen this discussed in a number of great ways. My favorite is

    Becky Malinsky
    ’s discussion of “Taste vs. Style”. The post is now paywalled, but here’s an excerpt from it that I like:

Consider our taste as our kingdom in taxonomic rank, and our style as our individual, VERY specific species. Or in simpler terms, taste is a general category in which things you love fall into. But not everything you love needs to be something you buy, own or wear. Not everything you love will suit you. Style is more specific. It's the things you love, that you wear (and don’t wear you) and make you feel confident and distinct. 

Relatedly…

11. Surrender to FOMO. There’s peace in accepting that there are endless nice clothes out there (beautiful, well-fitting, maybe even well-priced too) and you simply cannot have them all… so let yourself stop thinking about them. 

12. Embrace this bit of wisdom from Patagonia founder Yvon Chouinard: “The more you know, the less you need.” The thinking here goes: acquire knowledge to get to simplicity, which results in needing less. The book that this quote is from was one of the few that I managed to finish this year and that line has been imprinted on my mind ever since. In my view and experience, learning more about everything — the item itself, myself, the business of fashion — really goes a long way to make my wants and needs more intentional.

Here’s to finding shopping peace this holiday season, in the new year, and beyond! 🥂

— Jenny

If you’d like to give my writing some extra support, I’d be very grateful :)

Previously…

The case for dressing by color

Photo-op → photo-ready

My simple system for shopping planning